Benjamin Franklin once said, “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half shut afterwards.”
This quote reminds us to be cautious before getting married because once married, one has to bear responsibilities.
A good marriage is like being born into a good family—important for both men and women.
In today’s society, many people are choosing not to marry, leading to an increase in the number of people with a non-marriage attitude.
Why are there more non-marriage proponents nowadays? It boils down to these three reasons.
Burned in love
“A failed marriage is a tragedy; ending a tragedy is like starting a comedy.”
Love is enticing, but it can also harm. A good love story can uplift and shape a person, but a bad one can destroy them.
Although many people nowadays are avoiding marriage, a lot of them have experienced love and deep affection for others.
“I can still love others in my lifetime, but I dare not marry again.”
A woman who has suffered in love will find it hard to trust in love again. Without security in love, she will naturally avoid marriage.
Everyone is born with love in this world. As we mature, we develop affection for the opposite sex.
The first love for everyone is usually sincere and selfless. However, it may not always be reciprocated.
Some say, “Most first loves end in failure.”
People often grow up amidst disappointments, losing trust in others and love.
Many friends around us, kind as they are, have been hurt by their partners, leading them to lose faith in love.
A friend once told me, “I don’t even believe in love anymore, so why deceive someone by marrying them?”
Many people feel responsible for themselves and others, hence they choose not to marry.
These non-believers in love may never trust in love again or may meet someone who changes their perspective. At that point, they may reconsider marriage, hoping to find someone who truly loves and is loved by them, rekindling their belief in love.
High societal pressures
Modern society exerts immense pressure on individuals. For men, marriage often means owning a house and a car. Once married, women may have to give up working after having children.
Many avoid marriage due to fear. Marriage brings responsibilities, transitioning one from childhood to adulthood, requiring them to handle mature tasks.
We often encounter women who seek wealthy partners while they are young.
Some may consider these women materialistic or insincere, believing they don’t deserve true love.
But consider the immense pressure in life. Therefore, before marriage, we must carefully consider the life we envision afterward.
Why do some women choose wealthy partners? Perhaps their experiences have taught them the importance of power and money, leading them to marry someone influential.
However, wealthy and powerful individuals are a minority, making it hard for many women to find suitable partners, resulting in some choosing not to marry.
Similarly, men seek loving and caring wives, but finding a woman who meets these criteria is challenging.
Many fail to find their ideal partners, even if they choose not to marry; they refuse to settle and gradually embrace the single life.
Nothing is perfect. Choosing one thing may mean giving up another. Being overly selective often leaves one alone. Eventually, they become indifferent, less inclined towards marriage.
Independence and self-sufficiency
Many in today’s society can support themselves, feeling they don’t need a partner. Some believe a partner may only complicate their lives.
Men today focus on their careers. Establishing themselves in big cities, they neglect to settle down, prioritizing their professional lives.
Some men feel they don’t need a wife; their career is paramount.
Women today are no less. Many have successful careers in urban areas, with an increasing number having higher education. Independent and capable, they see no rush to marry.
When one can lead a fulfilling life alone, thoughts of another might fade away. Moreover, in our busy society, opportunities to meet new people are scarce.
Once, a journalist interviewed a woman, asking, “When do you plan to get married? What kind of partner are you looking for?”
The woman responded, “I have no requirements for a partner. I have never thought about marriage; I can live well on my own.”
Perhaps many in today’s society share this woman’s view, opting out of marriage. In today’s more liberal society, not marrying is a personal choice.
While some may criticize those who choose not to marry, never let others’ opinions compromise your decisions. Whether to marry or not is a personal choice, unrelated to others.
As for those who meddle in others’ marital decisions, they are simply idle, indulging in gossip about others’ lives that don’t concern them.